TheRodinhoods

If women could use the memory they have…

My wife and I are part of the regular party circuit. For those occasions when we head out to gatherings involving friends and family, my wife selects her clothes in a rather unique fashion:

She first asks me to choose an ensemble for her to wear. I am a predictable kind of a guy and quickly pick out something that is functional, dressy and most importantly speedy to put on. My motivation is my favorite saying – ‘time is of the essence’. In a few seconds of announcing my recommendation, it is ceremoniously rejected and dismissed by my wife. The reason (if I can luckily extract one) is always the same: ‘ Everyone we are meeting today saw me wearing these clothes last time and so I can’t repeat them’. She then authoritatively theorizes that the folks we met a few weeks or even months ago will actually remember what my wife (amidst 15-25 women) had worn!!

Really??

If that were the case, then my wife should in turn remember the clothes the other women wore. In that spirit, I ask her about to describe what my aunt or cousin was wearing in that party 2 months ago, but my questioning is cut short by wife slamming the bathroom door on me…

If I were to play CSI, I wonder what is the possibility of a human being (who is not trained to be a detective) to arrive in a dimly lit environment, then immediately meeting lots of folks, getting busy in husband bashing and gossip and even high on white wine to remember weeks later the clothes of other folks in that party setting were. I think ‘impossible’.

Still she may have a point…so if women can, so can Men. I mentally conduct an advanced google keyword search of my memory and try to remember what was the color of the trouser of that idiotic Uncle when we met the last time over dinner in a restaurant…. Hmmm… awwww….it just slips me. Ok – wait a minute, there was this moron who spilled his full whiskey glass on my brand new woolen trouser on my dad’s birthday dinner. Half an hour later and 2 whiskeys down, I had unsuccessfully tried to download a nice bloody Mary into his shirt….but he got the vibe and vanished… So what was the color of his garment? Hey…wasn’t it a white shirt…?? Errr….it could have been black… why can’t I remember the colour of my target i felt so strongly about??

To conclusively accept or reject this Einstein memory theory, I consciously made an effort to memorise what my wife wore on a couple of occasions, and then a few months later quizzed her on what she had worn for that event?

Believe it or not she remembered everything in detail and scared the wits out of me. I repeated this test on my mom who also passed with flying colors.

My perception of human memory has been altered forever.

Can women please channelize this memory power to fulfill 3 wishes I have for them:

1- Mentally absorb every chess move ever played and then beat the pulp out of all the Grand Masters out there and became the Grand Mistresses of Chess!!

2 – Remember every General Knowledge question that exists and monopolize all the Who wants to be a Millionaire Shows.

3 – Imbibe every musical score and nuance of the world’s best musical compositions and please conduct the New York and London Philharmonics…

And if you wear Black and White doing all the above, the world will still clap for you.

I dedicate this to my wife who is always the guinea pig of such posts of mine

If you liked this piece, you may also like my blog ‘Why do Women carry Large Handbags

***********

Originally posted on June 25, 2010 on rodinhood.com